Sassistas! Our dish on the social soup.

He Spoke to Us

"When I write, I aim in my mind not toward New York but toward a vague spot a little east of Kansas. I think of the books on library shelves, without their jackets, years old, and a countryish teen-aged boy finding them, and having them speak to him."

"Either nobody is a hero or everyone is.
I vote for everyone."

-- John Updike, renowned literary lion who died Tuesday and once said that
the aim of his work was to give "the mundane its beautiful due."

January 2009 Open Mic

The sassosphere microphone is open, sistas and mistas. 
Please step up and dish whatever you like.  We're listening.

Trapped on the Tarmac

 It all started with a little bird.

A little chirping bird perched on a high window ledge inside and above the gate entrance to US Airways Flight 1159 this past Tuesday morning.  When Flannista saw the small, sweet creature, her cold heart melted.  "Oh, it's a sign!" she thought.  "He's telling me that my first airline trip of the new year will be tranquil and -- dare I say it -- on time.  Oh, thank you, sweet bird, thank you!"

Flannista had awakened to reports of a significant snowfall in the National Capitol area that would begin about 8 a.m.  Her flight was scheduled to take off at 8:35 a.m.  She would be okay -- after all, the little bird had confirmed it. 

"Yes, sweet bird, you DID confirm it," Flannista thinks as she fastens her seat belt in seat 3D (upgraded to First Class even!) at 8:07 a.m.  She calls Matissta:  "I'm on board!  We'll be taking off on time!"

At 8:40 a.m., the plane moves away from the jetway.  Flannista checks the US Airways website on her iPhone where it says Flight 1159 has "departed."  Thank you, sweet bird!

At 8:44 a.m., the pilot announces, "Well, folks, it's going to be one of those mornings.  They have shut down all the runways except one and now it must be plowed and treated.  Then we must wait in line to be de-iced.  We won't be off the ground for another 45-50 minutes."  Flannista hears small groans around her and someone say, "At least we're not in the middle of the Hudson River."  The flight attendant passes around the First Class snack basket and Flannista grabs a bag of Sun Chips. We are told that there is not enough time to serve drinks.  We really will be taking off soon.  Thank you, sweet bird!

At 10:22 a.m., the pilot announces, "We've been given clearance.  We should be taking off in 20-25 minutes."  The plane taxis to the runway.  The snack basket is passed around.  Another bag of Sun Chips.

At 10:35 a.m., the pilot announces, "Well, folks, like I said, it's one of those mornings.  The runways are covered over again and we need to de-ice again.  We won't be taking off for another 30 minutes."  Snack basket.  Sun Chips.

At 11:33 a.m., Flannista can hear the crackling of the pilot's microphone.  Then silence.  The engines are turned off.  No snack basket.  No Sun Chips.  Sweet bird, where are you?  Flannista emails the story of the sweet bird she saw to PEACEsista, realizing now that the bird is the only thing flying this morning. PEACE responds by sending a poem her father wrote in 1969 during a contentious company board meeting:

THE DAWN

As I awoke this morning

  When all sweet things are born

A robin perched upon my sill

  To signal the coming morn.

The bird was fragile, young and gay

  So sweetly did it sing

That thoughts of joy and happiness

  into my heart did spring.

It hummed a lovely song so softly

  And paused for a moment's lull

I gently pulled the window down

  And crushed its f#cking skull.

At 12:04 pm -- my sweet bird now dead -- Flight 1159 takes off, nearly four hours after Flannista first fastened her seat beat.  Applause is heard throughout the cabin.  Once at a cruising altitude, the flight attendant makes the following announcement in her best Kyra Sedgewick, "The Closer" accent:

You'll have been so kind this morning that we've decided that we will distribute our snack boxes, which we normally charge $5 for, free of charge to whoever wants them.  Unfortunately we only have five snack boxes on board and would like to give them to the most diabetic folks . . . you know, the folks who really need them.

Snack basket.  Sun chips. 

It all started with a little bird.

Mrs. Wimer

The Sassistas!^TM would like to acknowledge and thank Jerseysista who dished today's sass.

Caught in the middle,

caught in the view,

our perspective is limited.

Billions of galaxies above,

each with billions of stars within,

are apprehended by minds freshly emerged,

fueled by stardust.

I had a teacher -- Mrs. Wimer -- for 1st and 2nd grade, who was missing her lower right forearm. In spite of this she taught two grades at once in a one-room school house. She was teacher, principal, cafeteria staff and maintenance crew all in one. She kept the coal stove in the center of the room stoked in the winter, played fly-to-the-moon with us on our imaginary rocket (an old log) in the playground and made school work papers by some sort of primitive "copier" that consisted of hard gel in a cake pan inked with a roller and covered with a typed stencil.

I don't remember much of the formal lessons Mrs. Wimer taught but I remember her taking us to do rubbings from the tombstones in the cemetery that bordered the school yard and wondering, "Just how old are these graves, anyway? How long ago, exactly, was the Revolution?" I remember collecting elderberries from which we squeezed juice to create a red ink to use with a quill and wondering, "If this comes from berries, where does blue ink come from?" I remember crushing sandstones and sifting the result through a screen and wondering, "Is the difference between rock and earth really just size? How small can a rock get before it's no longer a rock?"

I regularly think how grateful I am that I was taught to read but I am grateful, too, for having been taught to observe, experiment and wonder. I would love to hear what experiences the sistas and mistas have of teaching or being taught to wonder.

Oscar Hits and Misses

The Sassistas!^TM love the Academy Awards.  Without them, we would have never launched our own website to post our 2008 post-Oscar report . . . our very first Sassistas!^TM post!  Now that the 2009 Academy Award nominations are in, we'd like to proffer our Oscar nomination "Hits and Misses" and invite you to submit your own.  Click here for the complete list of the 2009 Oscar nominees.

Our biggest "hit" and "miss" are pictured above.  We LOVE that Melissa Leo (pictured above left) was nominated for Best Actress for "Frozen River," a film also nominated for Best Original Screenplay and a film nobody has seen.  Drop everything and see it.  We love Meryl Streep (like Westsista), but believe her performance in "Doubt" was WAY over the top, even though she won the Screen Actors Guild Award on Sunday. We saw "Doubt" as a play on Broadway and are still scratching our heads wondering why Cherry Jones, who won the Tony for playing Streep's role, wasn't cast as Sister Aloysius. 

Another HUGE miss for us was Angelina Jolie's nomination for "The Changeling."  Sorry, babe, we're so over you, though we loved you in "Wanted." We've seen both "The Reader" and "Revolutionary Road" and can't figure out, for a millisecond, why Kate Winslet was nominated for Best Actress for "The Reader" and NOT "Revolutionary Road," which we consider a better movie in every respect.  In fact, we're still stunned it wasn't nominated for "Best Picture."  We loved Anne Hathaway in "Rachel Getting Married," mainly because she nailed what it is like to be a family outcast.  A big miss was that Rosemarie Dewitt, who plays Rachel in the movie, wasn't nominated for Best Supporting Actress.  She was as luminous as Hathaway.

In the Best Actor category a big "Hit" for us was Richard Jenkins, nominated for "The Visitor."  The movie stole our hearts (just this past weekend), though we suspect that Mickey Rourke will win for "The Wrestler" (which of this writing we still haven't seen).

In quick order:  HITS -- Penelope Cruz for Best Supporting Actress in "Vicky Cristina Barcelona," Michael Shannon for Best Supporting Actor in "Revolutionary Road" and "The Garden" and "Man on Wire" for Best Documentary. 

MISSES -- ANYthing for "The Dark Knight," outside of Heath Ledger's Supporting Actor Role.  We watched this film over the weekend and were stunned that Heath Ledger could be so good in a film that was so bad, bad, bad and worse, banal. Ledger reached deep to touch something very, very dark inside him, and we can't help but wonder if playing "The Joker" didn't somehow propel him to his all-too-early-and-tragic death a year ago.

Please post your own Oscar "Hits" and Misses."

EstroFest 2009!

YES, THE ANNOUNCEMENT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR!

ESTROFEST 2009!  The Sassistas!^TM Super Bowl Party for women only!

Next Sunday, February 1, Flannista and Matissta will be hosting -- in Flannista's home and most importantly, on-line -- our FIFTH ANNUAL ESTROFEST . . . or as Singlemommasista calls it, THE ANNUAL BITCH BOWL!

Those sistas (and actually, mistas . . . if you want to come) within driving distance, are invited to attend, beginning with the Pre-Game Show which begins about 12 hours before kick-off.  The rest of you are invited to sassticipate in one of the following two ways: 

• First, by posting which team you believe will win -- the Steelers or the Cardinals . . . and why -- and by what point spread. 
• Second, by submitting your entries to our "Best Of" commentary (stuff actually said over the TV airwaves during the game) categories.  Following are those categories (in bold type) with actual commentary examples from last year's Super Bowl:

MOCK HEROIC:
-- At 4:57 pm, during the pre-game debacle, an announcer said, "This is the epicenter of the football world."
-- [We then voted to close this category following the shameless tribute to the Declaration of Independence or Magna Carta or Ten Commandments (something like that) that occurred about 5:50 pm. At one point during this mock-trosity, Flannista looked around the living room and all of us sat there stunned, with our mouths open. There was nothing to say.]

PATRIOTIC:
-- [We were going to close this category following the singing of the National Anthem (which showed live shots of solemn troops serving overseas) but during the game, one of us actually heard the following comment]: "We have another 9-11 down on the field."

BLATANTLY SEXUAL:
-- "Rockets red glare."
-- "The Giants definitely are having their way."
-- "I see some action in the back field with Tom Brady."
-- "He's been working David Deel pretty good."
-- And from a Bud Light ad -- "Suck on it."

CLEVERLY SEXUAL:
-- [No submissions]

ACCIDENTALLY SEXUAL:
-- "They are pushing right there in the middle."
-- "I was hyperventilating in the huddle."
-- "He's there in the slot."
-- "He's really had a hot hand during the post season."
-- "[someone] is getting an inside push."

EVIL-DOERS:
-- It's a crime against humanity."
-- "If you suck hard enough, you get a man."

WHAT WOULD JESUS SAY?
-- "The Patriots and NY Giants aren't playing for fortune and fame, they are playing for FOREVER."
-- "He learned at the foot of the master."
-- "Twenty-nine seconds and three time-outs is an eternity for Tom Brady."

JUST PLAIN STUPID:
-- "None of this means anything."
-- "All humans are created equal."
-- [We then lost count. babysis suggests we "just roll the tape back" for more submissions.]

THAT HURTS MY FEELINGS:
-- "He needs to head over to Mt. Passmore."
-- "Some people say the team is better without him." (about an injured player in the box watching the game)

And the surprise category announced just before the game started . . .
EMILY DICKINSON: [anything obtuse or recluse]
-- "If you are not able to get the defensive hands down . . ."
-- "He opens up that lane."
-- "They have two different handles. They don't come together."
-- "The ball came in like a missile." [This could also be in the "blatantly sexual" category.]

The 2009 surprise category will NOT be announced until just before the 2009 Super Bowl starts -- so tune in next Sunday to learn what the surprise category is.  Today, however, please submit your predictions for the outcome as well as sassgestions for NEW commentary categories.

In the mean time, please know that the Sassistas!^TM are out and about getting EstroFest 2009 party supplies!

Which Wolf Do You Feed?

 

There is a story attributed to Cherokee wisdom:

One evening a grandfather was teaching his young grandson about the internal battle that each person faces.

“There are two wolves struggling inside each of us,” the old man said. “One wolf is vengefulness, anger, resentment, self-pity and fear.  The other wolf is compassion, faithfulness, hope, truth and love."

The grandson sat thinking, then asked: “Which wolf wins, Grandfather?”

His grandfather replied, “The one you feed.”

There are crises banging on the door right now, pawing at us, trying to draw us off our ethical center  -- crises that tempt us to feed the wolf of vengefulness and fear.

We need you, Mr. President, to hold your ground. We need you, leaders of this nation, to stay centered on the values that have guided us in the past; values that empowered to move us through the perils of earlier times and can guide us now into a future of renewed promise.

We need you to feed the good wolf within you, to listen to the better angels of your nature, and by your example encourage us to do the same.

-- from the sermon delivered by Rev. Sharon Watkins at the National Prayer Service for the new President and his Cabinet on January 21, 2009 at the National Cathedral

The Farewell from Hell

It wouldn't be Inaugural Week at Sassistas!^TM without one last post about the Bush administration, specifically, the farewell address to employees by the departing Secretary of the Interior, Dirk Kempthorne.  Seems he began his address last week with a presentation of 600 slides, each picturing the distinguished secretary, many of them taken at a national park.  Pictured right is the left foot of the former Secretary at Yellowstone National Park.  According to the Washington Post, a longtime employee in attendance said, "Slide after slide after slide.  It was special.  That's all I should say."

Well, the Sassistas!^TM would certainly like to say more!  Our in-depth sassearch reveals that the outgoing Secretary spent $235,000 on renovations to his office bathroom, including adding a refrigerator, freezer, wood paneling and monogrammed towels.  Perhaps Kempthorne thought his appointment also required interior decorating.  In any event, that's a lot of taxpayer money down the you-know-what.  Plus, we're a bit alarmed that a refrigerator and freezer were added to the bathroom, butt we digest, er, digress.

Initially, we were going to let this story slide, being that Kempthorne and the rest of the Bush administration have departed the nation's Capitol.  But then we read a Washington Post article about how little money was spent on keeping the White House technologically saavy over the past eight years.  This undoubtedly explains why Kempthorne had to use this to project his 600 slides during his unforgettable farewell.

The Long Journey from Selma

The Sassistas!^TM would like to acknowledge and thank barista who captured the above image while at the Inauguration this Tuesday and found and forwarded the video that ends this post.

On January 20, citizens of the United States and around the world saw how far America has come. A busload of high school students from Selma, Alabama had to see it firsthand.  They traveled 12 hours to the nation's Capitol to "be a part of history," as one student says in the video below, his home town of Selma already a part of history.

Although the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 outlawed segregation in public places and in public schools, the legislation had failed to adequately address voting rights for blacks, and Southern whites were intent on prohibiting blacks from voting. They enforced literacy tests and poll taxes that prohibited blacks from participating in the political process.  In Selma, Alabama, black disenfranchisement was high. While 99 percent of white residents were registered to vote, the majority of blacks could not vote.  It was here that Dr. Martin Luther King planned several marches.  The procession from Selma to Montgomery on March 7, 1965, often referred to as Bloody Sunday, was the one that made history.

With SNCC’s John Lewis, the head of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC), and Hosea Williams, the head of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference, in the lead, 600 marchers set out for Montgomery by way of the Edmund Pettus Bridge. As the approached the bridge, they could see the Alabama state troopers and Selma police officers stationed across the bridge. According to Jessica McElrath in "Voting Rights in Selma, Alabama":

Lewis and Williams were well aware that should they proceed, the procession could result in grave harm to the demonstrators. They had learned prior to the march that Governor George Wallace had given the order to stop the procession by any means necessary. Nevertheless, once on the bridge, they decided to neither stop nor turn around despite the warning from Major John Cloud to leave the bridge. They kept walking and as they had anticipated the troopers and officers attacked them with nightsticks, bullwhips, and used tear gas to impede their procession. Many demonstrators managed to return to the chapel unharmed, but seventy-eight returned injured.

The media relayed these bloody events to the nation.  Dr. King immediately planned a Tuesday walk across the bridge which prompted President Johnson to send a mediator to Selma to work with both sides.  On March 15, Johnson introduced a voting rights bill to Congress.  On March 21, Dr. King once again began a march from Selma to Montgomery.  When Gov. Wallace refused to provide protection, President Johnson federalized the Alabama National Guard to protect the marchers. It took five days to reach Montgomery from Selma, where the march concluded with a speech from King on the steps of the state capitol to an audience of 25,000.  On August 6, Johnson signed the Voting Rights Act into law.

No wonder the Selma, Alabama high school students photographed by barista are tired!  Although Selma still has challenges, as the video below attests, it continues to move beyond discrimination.  These high school kids went the extra mile to see for themselves just how far.

Praise Song for the Day

It is early morning after the Inauguration of Barack Obama, and Flannista did not sleep well, waking up several times with thoughts such as, "The party is over."  "Once your feet hit the ground, you must begin."  "It really is up to you."  

Yesterday was fun and joyful.  The Sassistas!^TM were glued to television coverage most of the day with our neighbor, Sassley, even popping champagne during the flubbed Presidential oath (see above).  However, by last evening, Flannista had read Obama's inaugural address several times and taken in the sobering welcome from Wall Street which fell more than 330 points as investors fled financial companies that appear more troubled than previously thought. 

As our new President said in his address: . . . we are in the midst of crisis. . . our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age.

What kept Flannista awake, however, were these words from his address: Less measurable, but no less profound, is a sapping of confidence across our land, a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, that the next generation must lower its sights.

Too often, Flannista has allowed fear to sap her confidence and lower her sights.  However, the time really has come for her to put away childish things and become a risk-taker, a doer, a maker of things -- knowing that, for the most part that she -- like most of us -- will labor in obscurity.  But we really do:

. . . have duties to ourselves, our nation and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character than giving our all to a difficult task.

"How will I give my all to a difficult task?"  "What will be that task?"  More questions on Flannista's heart as her feet hit the ground this morning, fueled by the confidence of a new President and the closing words of the stunningly healing Inaugural poem, "Praise Song for the Day," by Elizabeth Alexander:

In today's sharp sparkle, this winter air, anything can be made, any sentence begun.

On the brink, on the brim, on the cusp -- praise song for walking forward in that light.