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June 27, 2009


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Hell, yes.


Her "mistakes" must have been more fun than mine. I would not opt to live mine over again, sooner or later ... once was quite enough.


Yeah. I appreciate the spirit of the comment, the casual hubris. My mistakes were, for the most part, painful and costly. Some of them were necessary, some avoidable, but don't know that I would choose to make them all again, whether sooner OR later.


"Casual hubris." Great description, Carolyn. I think that is what I admire about Bankhead from what I have heard about her the last couple of days.

In regard to mistakes, I'll live with mine (in some instances literally). I'm learning not to regret them. I definitely would not willingly make the same mistakes again.


What hooked me about Bankhead's quote was the word that I chose as the title of this post: SOONER.

We're all bound to make mistakes. I wish I had made mine a lot sooner, so I would have learned some important things a lot sooner. Things like this:

-- Jesus has very little to do with the institutional church.

-- Laugher is more important in relationships than security. In fact, security in relationships is a lot of bull shit.

-- Money and power make you stupid.

Man, I wish I had learned these things when I was half my age. Maybe back then it was my casual hubris that prevented me.


Hmm, that's an interesting spin - my first reaction was the same as Carolyn, Jersey and PEACE. But I don't know that I would have been ready to learn my life lessons before I did at normal speed.

I have thought that it would be interesting to relive young adulthood knowing what I know now, but I would NOT want to relive and relearn again...hurt enough the first time around!



Here's one of my favorite quotes from Bankhead (from "Looped"):

"Touching a woman's purse is like touching her vagina . . . except my purse can't hold as much."


Another Bankhead quote from "Looped," this one filled with wisdom:

"You can't choose whether or not your life will be painful, but you can choose whether or not you will suffer."


I think what I liked about Bankhead, after seeing the play and reading a bit about her life, was that she knew who she was and she lived her life. No excuses, no explanations, no justifications. Of course, the Bankhead in the play was 62 years old and nearing her death.

I don't think I had a clue as to who I was until about the age of 45. It took a lot of soul searching and therapy to knock down the walls of my public persona, the walls of the me I thought everyone else wanted me to be, the walls of my fears, to figure out for myself who I was and what I wanted in life.

There's something remarkably freeing about aging. I don't know if I would want to make my mistakes sooner. The lessons would have been lost on the 'casual hubris' of youth.

What I know is that I like who i am now more than I ever have in my life. So my mistakes? I'm thankful for the opportunity to learn from them. They are part of who I am now, so I wouldn't wish them undone.

My two cents worth.


Me, too, treesta. "I like who I am now more than I ever have in my life."


Make that three of us.


I agree, but the purse thing - nah. I'm not that into my purse...


I don't even carry a purse!


And kiddo carries a bag! What to make of that?


I carry a purse . . . a small one. Can't fit everything in there.

Another Bankhead quote:

"I'm bisexual. Buy me something, and I'm sexual."


I just read an article that said that Sanford cited King David as justification that he should remain in office. Isn't there also a clause in the Bible somewhere that adulterers should be stoned to death? Oh, yeah, that was just the women. Guys get to play by different rules. Unless it's Tallulah Bankhead, who made up her own rules. How's that for keeping it on topic? Grin.


Pretty damn good, treesta. Thanks.


I definitely like this quote of hers, maybe I'll start using this excuse when I get bugged about journaling:

It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.”
~~Tallulah Bankhead


I keep both a diary and a journal AND I'm a a bad girl.


I tell my wild daughter that her mistakes are part of her and to be accepted the same as her knees or her tiny ears. The important thing is to try to avoid life-changing mistakes-felonies, babies...the others can be noted and used.
"The barn burned down, now I can see the moon" kind of attitude.

We had a dog named Talulah. I love the quotes and the info about her.


I agree with Ms. Bankhead. If I had to live my life over again, I would like to make my mistakes sooner because I tried to be so good when I was young that I made most of my misery-causing mistakes when I was in my later years. How I would like to make them all in my early 20's and have almost 40 years to benefit from that knowledge. As it is, I may only have 30 years to benefits from the doozies I have made.

Flann, not a truly bad girl or you couldn't keep a diary and a journal and a blog and a job and a relationship. You're "gooder" than you think.


Justista -- honored to have you comment. Thank you.

half-a: my brother. If I am "gooder," it's because of folks like you. Deep bow.


There is a reason that Talulah is not remembered in some better light. She is kind of gross.

Always believed we had some quota of screwups in us all that will come out at some time or another. I had no illusions of being good when I was younger and had some meanderings of a misspent youth. I think it because we were well advised that at 18, they could put you in jail.

There is a likely reason that PEACE's folks were not fond of me . . . initially.

Would I make the same mistakes again ? Sure, some were a lot of fun. I probably would not have the energy for them now. Others are bad memories I choose to put behind.

Guess I used up my quota at a younger age though far from mistake free at this old age.

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