One week ago, the Sassistas! waited with the rest of the world for the big announcement from Apple about its next breakthrough product. We had read the breathless speculation about what it probably was: the Apple tablet or iTablet or Magic Slate or iSlate. But when we learned the name of the new product, we knew immediately that no women had been involved in the naming of the product: iPad. To give you an idea of what we mean, please take a minute to view the above video -- from THREE YEARS AGO.
An hour after the announcement, #iTampon was a trending topic on Twitter. Like the rest of the female majority, the Sassistas! have some questions for Apple:
- Will the next version have wings?
- Can we only use it during certain times of the month?
- Will the 64GB be called the MaxiPad?
The jury's still out about whether or not I want want one of these things. I did, in fact, follow Twitter postings the moment the iPad was announced and when I read the name, my first thought was feminine hygiene products and:
"What were they thinking?"
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 05:44 AM
If only women had named this product and no men were involved, it would have been called: iDO.
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 07:59 AM
Hey sassosphere: I'm going to be away most of the day conducting a creative session in downtown DC. Now hear me now and hear me loud -- I'm using this post as an example of creativity, so don't let me down.
Come up with some Apple product names, like this one for how we all feel about the sassosphere:
iCare
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 08:01 AM
So I could prove I was a true American TV viewer, I watched the "Lost" episode last evening that caught everyone up on what's been going on since the first season -- the only season I watched. Then I began to watch the first episode of the sixth and final season.
WHAT???!! I need a software product to understand it:
iAMLOST
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 08:03 AM
Yeah, the naming of the iPad was not only a bad choice, it lacked creativity. I guess they had thrown all of their energy into creating the product.
I've heard that the iPad is a disappointment to most. It's not there yet; it needs more development and features.
The one positive comment is that it's a great eReader. It's perfect for reading the newspaper. The industry is hoping that it will help save the newspaper business. I'm all for that.
iHOPE
Posted by: Matissta | February 03, 2010 at 08:42 AM
If God had created the iPad, he would have called it iAM.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 09:33 AM
If Helen Keller had named the iPad, she would have called it iSee.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 09:34 AM
Did you hear they have a new version of the iPhone for poker players? It's called iFold. Also a hit with origami enthusiasts.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 09:37 AM
There will be a special iPad for industrialist CEOs called iCahn.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 09:38 AM
And iCahn makes me think of iCan't (which would be one of those names the men-only group should have considered for the viagra set).
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 09:41 AM
How about a device to study Taoism?:
iChing
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 09:50 AM
There are also the accessories: iSocket, iBall (not sure what the men-only group might think of that), iLash (for Critty or the S&M group)and iTooth (better than blue tooth).
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 10:05 AM
For breast cancer awareness, Apple will produce a limited edition PINKi.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 10:06 AM
To boost the popularity of this product (and to help the failing newspaper industry) they are being installed at breakfast and lunch counters accross the nation. You will also find them when you belly-up to your favorite bar. These versions:
iEat and iDrink.
Posted by: PEACEsista | February 03, 2010 at 10:34 AM
This just in:
A new iPad version will allow those who log in to Sassistas! to make an instant $10 donation to the Haitian relief effort, with each comment posted.
It's called: iGive.
The slogan: iGive ... so others may live.
Posted by: PEACEsista | February 03, 2010 at 10:44 AM
PEACE, I hear the iEat and iDrink will be followed shortly with the iBMerry. (Altho, I am sure Matiss and Flann think I should order the iBSnoozin.)
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 10:58 AM
There has been a covert indoctrination going on for years! As we have been told to click on icons, it was all a ploy to get us primed for the iCon (not to be confused with the iPro). The iCon is expected to be particularly popular with the prison crowd and those of the Eastern Orthodox persuasion.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 11:00 AM
iAlone. iAlone. iAlone. (Except for PEACE)
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 11:37 AM
Woe-Is-i. Woe-Is-i. Woe-Is-i.
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 11:38 AM
Jersey, put the coffee cup down.
iPlead
You actually had some good ones in there, but I couldn't help myself in a little jabbing.
iJoke
Posted by: Matissta | February 03, 2010 at 12:05 PM
iLaugh
Posted by: Jerseysista | February 03, 2010 at 12:33 PM
I was away for awhile, testing the new hands-free device, iDrive,a great way to access the internet while on the road!
Posted by: PEACEsista | February 03, 2010 at 02:16 PM
Am just reading these. You were a hit!
iThanku
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 02:24 PM
Just read through these again. Very creative stuff, my sistas! Honestly, you made me look VERY good at my meeting today. You all are poets:
iAMBIC
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 04:04 PM
If prostitutes had named the new Apple product:
iDAHO
Posted by: Flannista | February 03, 2010 at 04:05 PM