New Friend

Last week, on Ash Wednesday, Flannista made her daily call to Jerseysista a little later than usual. First thing Jersey asked was where Flann had been. Flann confessed that she had spent the last hour and a half at the office store picking out a new journal.  Seems like the one she had been keeping since June 14, 2004 (thick, black-leather-bound, 600 pages, bottom above) was finally full.

"It took you THAT long to find a new journal?" asked Jersey.

"Of course," responded Flann. "For one thing, it had to be lighter.  I can't carry around a heavy journal anymore.  Plus it had to be leather bound with graph paper inside -- my arthritis needs the guidance.  And it had to lie flat and have a ribbon marker and a pocket folder.  Took me a while."

Pictured on top of her old journal is Flann's new journal. A perfect size -- 240 pages -- complete with graph paper, ribbon marker and pocket folder.  It was sad to depart with her old friend of more than five and a half years, but Flann is happy to have a new friend with whom she can travel. She's been traveling with these friends since 1973 (see photo below).

How about the rest of you?  Do you keep a journal or writing tablet?  Are you fussy about the paper and the binding?  How about the pen you write with?  If so, why?  Please share so Flann doesn't feel like such a picky broad.

Comments

[Flannista]

The bottom photo in today's post includes all the journals (in chronological order) that I've been keeping since 1973. The first one, on the far left, was a Christmas gift from my mother. Half of these journals, in fact, are gifts. The front and back covers of one are original paintings by Tim Lowly -- an old friend whose art now hangs in the Metropolitan in New York City.

It took about 15 years to discover that I preferred journals that would lie flat. For about three years, I experimented with journals that had removable pages, but I discovered I often wanted to look up something.

I am often asked what will happen to them once I die. I also have been keeping a diary since 1978 and have all of those on another shelf. I have no idea what will happen to my journals and diaries once I leave this sweet world.

Ashes to ashes, I suppose.

[nowayasista]

A picky broad? Nahhh . . . who would think such a thing? I always surmised that those who keep journals and diaries really want someone to read them. I have to keep a daily supervisory log at work. It can become a journal. In between client instructions, or some internal HR note, may be something like "pick up tomatoes"; "run an extra mile"; "www.sassistas.com." Blue ink preferably. Basic spiral notebook style. Destroyed after 7 years per regulation.

[Carolyn]

leave them to me. i'll write a book about you.

my own journals, except for the past few years are history. as i'd revealed in a previous post, i destroyed them all once i discovered a family member was reading them (and had actually taken one and hidden it).

i spend more time chosing pens and journals than i do picking out clothes, shoes, or a hair style. actually, i can't say that i've ever chosen a hair style. anyway, one of my most prized possessions is a mont blanc pen that betterhalf gave me. she placed it in a black box and had "seize the thought" engraved on it in latin. as a side thought -- that sort of thoughtfulness has marked our 19 years together.

journals? always leather, no zipper, like flann, gotta have a ribbon marker and lines. i don't do well without lines. squared-off corners, not rounded, and preferably brown.

[Carolyn]

. . . don't really care for ballpoint pens.

[Carolyn]

Noway, I figured you for a black-ink sort've guy.

[Flannista]

noway -- like Carolyn, I kinda figured you as a black-ink dude. I only write in black ink and now exclusively with one type of pen. I'll take a photo of my pens and post it in a bit, along with the story about why I use them.

I have about three Mont Blanc pens -- two old fountain pens that I gave up because the ink always leaked when I flew in airplanes. Air pressure or something. I now occasionally use a Mont Blanc that takes Roller Ball refills. Always black ink. Always Fine Point.

Okay, I'm a picky broad.

[Flannista]

Carolyn -- that's a mighty thoughtful gift from betterhalf. Just curious, what is "Seize the Thought" in Latin?

I gave up squared-off corners on my newest journal in order to have a journal with graph paper, Carolyn. I'll show it to you some time. Also, the paper isn't white -- but an off-white. New for me. But it holds roller-ball ink well. I need a fast writing pen. Learned that from Natalie Goldberg's workshops. Ballpoints somehow slow down the thoughts.

[Flannista]

noway -- I do not keep a diary or journal so someone will read them. I keep them, honesty, as companions. Anne Frank called hers, "Kitty." I've never named any of mine, but sometimes, I do write in my journal as though I'm speaking to it. Kind of inviting it to pull up a chair and sit next to me.

Winston Churchill kept a journal. So did Oscar Wilde, who said: "I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train."

[Flannista]

Carolyn -- don't know how I missed, "leave them to me. i'll write a book about you" (above).

While I'm flattered and honored that someone with your writing skills would venture to write a book about me, I fear that if you base it on what you discover in my journals and diaries, you'll have a readership of only one (meaning you) . . . that is, if you don't die first from the sheer tedium of my words . . . most of which are vacuous and completely self-involved.

[Carolyn]

Ummm . . . hope I'm getting this right, the engraving is very fine: "Carpe Cogitatio", I think it says.

Yeah, gotta have that fine point because my writing tends toward the small side. It has to dry quickly too, no smearing. I used fountain pens for years, and have a really fantastic Mont Blanc one with a 14kt gold nib (gift from a doctor's wife--another story, that).

So, no leaving of the journals to me, eh? Oh, well.

[Flannista]

CARPE COGITATIO.

I like that.

One of my Mont Blancs has a 14kt gold nib, too. Would love to hear the story of you and the doctor's wife, Carolyn.

Carolyn, why would I leave my journals to anyone I love?

[Carolyn]

Because it's a profound expression of love and most importantly, trust.

And we both know what a sucker I am for such.

[Flannista]

To prove my point about diary and journal tedium . . . I'm asking the sistas and mistas to pick ANY day from January 1973 to today for a journal entry and ANY day from January 1, 1978 to today for a diary entry. I promise to reveal what I wrote (without disrespecting any confidences).

I think you'll see what I mean by tedium.

CARPE BANTERO

[Carolyn]

Flann? Did you have an acquaintance with a doctor's wife also?

Wait. I think that this could be called "hijacking the sass". Ignore that question. Carry on, sistas.

[Flannista]

No, I did not, Carolyn. All my Mont Blancs have been purchases I made. I honestly can't say I know ONE doctor's wife. Interesting.

My pens are Pilot Dr. Grips -- the one in the middle (of the photo linked below) is most special to me as it was given to me by PEACEsista shortly after we first met at that Taos writing retreat. We were writing constantly -- so much so that the arthritis in my fingers began to flare up. PEACE had led our class in a couple of yoga sessions, so I dropped her a note (it was a silent retreat) about what exercises I would do to lessen the pain in my right hand. She showed me some and then suggested that my writing pen was too thin and that I needed one with a thicker barrel. Right then and there, she GAVE me the pen she had been using -- the Dr. Grip in this photo. So PEACEsista like, no?

The Mont Blanc on the far right I purchased at the Chicago airport during a long weather delay. There's a reason those expensive stores are in airports. You'll buy most anything to feel better.

Here are my pens:

http://www.sassistas.com/sassistas_our_dish_on_the/2010/22/pens.jpg

I write in my journal with PEACE's pen. Diary with the Mont Blanc. The Dr. Grip on the left sits on my office desk. The one on the right travels with me.

Haven't named them.

[Flannista]

And here are my diaries. Each one has been a holiday gift from Charlissta since 1978. She writes a lovely inscription at the beginning of each one and then writes special thoughts for special days that I discover throughout the year.

A lovely annual gift, now numbering 32 diaries.

http://www.sassistas.com/sassistas_our_dish_on_the/2010/22/diaries.jpg

[Jerseysista]

I pick July 4, 1976 for a journal entry.

[Flannista]

Thank you for randomly picking that day, Jersey.

No journal entry -- just a photo of me and my friend, Laurel, surrounded by tens of thousands of folks at the Washington Monument --a photo taken some time in the afternoon. Laurel and I arrived at 7 a.m. that morning and left about 11 pm that night after the humongous Bicentennial Fireworks display.

Sorry about that, Jerse. Wanna choose another day? Guess you picked that one, knowing there'd be little chance my entry would be entirely about me.

[Jerseysista]

April 27, 1982, journal and diary.

[Justista]

My mother (who was an amazing traveling woman-took little magic tricks-scarf in a fake thumb kind of thing -- with her to the streets of India to entertain the children) kept journals for 40 years. When she died, my sister seized 4 years worth of journals and has kept them from me. I remember those four years -- I was an asshole -- so my sister doesn't want me to see what my mother wrote about me. She's been dead 10 years, To Justista's sister -- I can handle it, give up the journals!

Also, I haven't started it yet but Louise Erdrich's new book is about a woman who finds out that her husband is reading her journals so she writes stuff in them on purpose.

[PEACEsista]

Justista, I love the story about your mother. You could write a great memoir about that time in your life by using your mother's real voice and yours. Yes, you can handle it. You need to read those journals, too.

[PEACEsista]

I am on my third year of writing a haiku a day and diary/journal. For this, I prefer a Moleskine calendar, 5"x8", this year's is red, hard bound, with rounded corners, ribbon and pocket. Most importantly, it has a weekly calender on the left-hand side (perfect for a haiku) and lined pages on the right-hand side for a diary/journal.

My favorite pen is the Uniball Signo 207, medium point, 0.7MM with black ink.

For regular writing practice any lined notebook will do, but I prefer a smaller format, because it's easier to carry around.

For me, journal writing is writing practice. It helps to get me out of the way and creates the space for other writing to happen. I've thrown many journals away.

If something goes terribly wrong, like when I broke my back 18 months ago, I read it to see what was happening before that. In that case, a quick review revealed that I was exhausted and wanted to take a break from my regular schedule, but I didn't. I got busier instead and then, I got a REAL break. A journal keeps me honest in taking responsibility for my own life and my own happiness. I don't usually ever read it, unless something goes terribly wrong (which is not often) but it always reveals the path to where I've landed.

[Flannista]

I'm with PEACE, Justista -- read those journals. Read them. You have such a great writing voice. To read the journals would reveal more of where it came from.

JUSTISTA'S SISTER: GIVE UP THE JOURNALS!

I am a third of the way through Shadow Tag, Louise Erdrich's new book, Justista. A very compelling read. I bought it because I read that much of it is based on Erdrich's sad relationship with the late Michael Dorris. Also, my mother read my journals when I was growing up (I just now remembered that I've been keeping journals since before 1973 and that they are probably in the attic somewhere) -- and I sometimes made false entries in them to ensure her that I was an obedient daughter. Later, I created my own hieroglyphics and language (like Anthony Burgess uses in "A Clockwork Orange") so she would be unable to understand what I was writing.

[Flannista]

Here is PEACEsista's pen:

http://www.lupel.com.ph/images/signo207.gif

When did you start using this pen and why, PEACEsista?

I remember you telling me that about your Moleskine Calendar, PEACE, and how much you liked it for haiku. Here's an image of one of them:

http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/b/0/0/60/7/AAAAC6H7PbMAAAAAAGB3cg.jpg

I was also quite touched by your perspective: "A journal keeps me honest in taking responsibility for my own life and my own happiness. I don't usually ever read it, unless something goes terribly wrong (which is not often) but it always reveals the path to where I've landed."

I've never gone back in a journal to retrace where my path veered off. I've gone back to find a quote and/or to see what I was thinking that day, but not really to retrace. Now I'm glad I've hung onto my journals.

Jersey -- I had to take a call from a client, but will be back with April 27, 1982. Did you just pick that date randomly or does it have special meaning to you?

[Flannista]

PEACE -- care to share a recent haiku?