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March 12, 2010

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Flannista

'Fess up, birthday girl (I know, it's not really until tomorrow). I thought I saw you in the crowd in that video link provided in the post. The video is 10 minutes long, but worth every every second of slaw-ter. Again, be advised that some images are a bit distasteful.

Going out to eat for your birthday? Pass on the slaw.

Flannista

Last weekend, half-a-sista ran this Wrestling Match by the Sassistas! as an idea for a possible post. At first I didn't think we would find ANY reason to post such a story in the 'sphere.

Then we remembered babysis would be celebrating a birthday. We remembered her post called "Monster Jam".

Kismet.

Flannista

babysis -- if you are going to participate next year, I don't recommend that you wear this t-shirt:

http://www.zazzle.com/theres_nothing_sexy_about_coleslaw_tshirt-235044735925094464

Flannista

Another, somewhat shorter video of the Cabbage Patch Wrestling Matches in 2009:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8enpwo23RsQ

Flannista

My favorite line from the 2010 video linked in half-a's actual post:

"Jabba the Gut"

half-a-sista

A little clarification is necessary here. I sent this article to Flann for her amusement. She suggested that I write a post about it. I was hesitant until she told me it was babysis' birthday tomorrow and how babysis loved coleslaw. What could I do, but write a post?

It was not my idea first though, babysis.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY and may your birthday wishes come true.

NOTE: This was birthday week in babysis' household as hubby turned 50 on ?Monday?

half-a-sista

My grandmother made excellent slaw by all reports. At the time I wouldn't touch the stuff (probably because intuitively I knew that in about 35 years someone would start coleslaw wrestling). My mother didn't get the recipe because my grandma used "a pinch of this" and a "spoonful of that" but she never knew the quantities. It was sweet and creamy with a little cream/milk and some sugar.

Coleslaw is kinda like Chinese food. It depends on what restaurant you go to as to the taste.

half-a-sista

Heather, the current Ms. Coleslaw Wrestling Champ, attends a local college. No, she isn't studying to be a chef or to be a cabbage farmer.

You can get a Cabbage Patch doll dressed like a wrestler. You must provide your own coleslaw.

Flannista

More clarification needed, half-a:

I suggested you write a post about it in honor of babysis's birthday because she would love to watch sports such as Cabbage Patch wrestling . . . not simply because she loved coleslaw. I was thinking about her aesthetic sensibilities. I don't want to step on her artistic toes by reducing this sport to mere coleslaw.

By the way, my favorite line in your post is "the wrestlers began the long slaw crawl to the top". That's just poetry.

Flannista

half-a: I linked an image of a Cabbage Patch doll dressed like a wrestler in the "WARNING" preceding your post.

A quessass for the 'sphere. What puts the "cole" in coleslaw? Further, what puts the "slaw"?

I've been up all night wrestling with these mysterious, even heartbreaking, questions. Is the word "coleslaw" an oxymoron?

A koan?

An omen?

Flannista

The real connoisseurs of this sport watch the matches in 3D glasses and think Jersey is an idiot.

half-a-sista

How do "the real connoisseurs" even know Jersey? She attends the coleslaw wrestling championships in Samsula?

Flannista

Jerseysista, like her whisks (which may come in handy when making coleslaw), is omnipresent, half-a. She can be at the wrestling championships WHILE being where she is right now as I click the computer keys . . . in bed, sleeping.

half-a-sista

"Coleslaw" is from a partial translation of the Dutch term "koolsla". Kool meant "cabbage" and sla was an abbreviation of "salade" so there you have it: "cabbage salad".

The Dutch do not, however, engage in coleslaw wrestling, maybe a little slinging, but no wrestling.

half-a-sista

Flann, do you like coleslaw? What's your favorite off the mat? No mayo? No vinegar? No pepper?

Before the referee starts the matches, he gathers the women together and lays down the slaw.

Flannista

Thank you for the literal meaning of "coleslaw," half-a. However, every time I see the word "coleslaw" and/or view the videos in this post, the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I feel a chill in the air. Far off in the distance, I hear a wolf howling.

Is there something inherently evil about coleslaw? Is this what is fed to the the seven horses of the apocalypse? I shudder just thinking about it. Really, ever notice how coleslaw is ADDED TO EVERYTHING YOU ORDER IN A RESTAURANT? I tell you, it's the work of the devil!

Flannista

Obviously, I live in abject terror of coleslaw, half-a.

My profound fear is that we live in a country where there are WAY TOO MANY slaw-abiding citizens.

Carolyn

What is it about bikers and females flopping about in food that seem to go together? Any good biker bash will include a pit of mud, jello, or whipped cream & gals willing to wrassle for the hoots & hollers (or buck and a quarter).

Happy Birthday to my very dear babesis. My heart -- well, you know how I feel.

What a great post, half-a. Your writing captured the spirit of the event exquisitely. Kudos.

Flannista

What? No coleslaw recipes, Carolyn? Perhaps one that includes beets?

Any theories on slaw's sinister side as a side?

Chrysosistah

Half-a, LOVE this line, "he gathers the women together and lays down the slaw." LOL!

Happy birthday, babysis! Hope the weather clears and you have a glorious weekend!

nowayasista

I will have to tell PEACE to forget about all of those places we want to go. We cannot miss Samsula 2011. It just went to top of the list.

She will love it.

half-a-sista

Flann, I think the hairs standing up on the back of your head mean (a) it's time to wash your hair or (b) this post was a little too stimulating for you (if you get my drift).

The horses of the FOUR MEN OF THE APOCALYPSE don't eat anything except maybe our sons and daughters. The websites weren't really clear on that.

You know that slaw is the salad of the poor as in Marie Antoinette losing her head over, "Let them eat slaw" while she dined on hearts of palm, butter lettuce and vineagrette.

Found a reference to a Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Burger Challenge.

Flannista

Ah-hem, nowayasista. Come clean -- you will love Samsula, too.

half-a: you may be onto something in terms of washing my hair. I did it at the beginning of the month, but sometimes I need to wash it a couple times a month.

Your reference to a "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Burger Challenge" only solidifies my fears that the devil is in these wacky food wrasslings that involve hootin' and hollerin' and scantily clad babes. It's simply not natural.

Sistasista

It's kind of scary to admit, but I know a man that actually served as the referee for this event a few years back.

For some reason, I think it's false advertising . . . the girls in the video don't look much like the girls in the ad.

Flannista

Sistasista! Where you been, girlfriend?!

Yes, that is a scary admission, however, I know that serving as a referee at an event of this caliber requires special skills. Did you know him well enough to know what those skills were?

And you're absolutely right about the false advertising. I was crushed (like the coleslaw) when I saw the actual wrasslin' babes. Kind of the way I felt when I learned that Sarah Palin was actually human.

Devastating.

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