That Time of Age

Yesterday, the Sassistas! published Part One of our "What Women Want" series.  "That Time of Month" examined how the new U By Kotex femcare products are helping women across the world embrace all they were meant to be with color and 'tude.  Today we take a closer look at a product designed especially for women coping with one of the many gifts of menopause: hot flashes.

Pictured above is Flannista's Chillow, "the original comfort device (note that the "o" in Chillow is a Happy Face)."  Matissta sassgested Flann purchase one when the temperature in her home (a quarter mile away) elevated every time Flann got the night sweats.  Flann was very excited about the Chillow as hot flashes wake her up at least three times a night.  But how does it work?  How does it stay cool WITHOUT refrigeration?

The answer is Chillow's "SoothSoft technology" that:

 . . . mixes with water to absorb and then dissipate heat back into the air producing a natural, cooling effect.  With one-time activation, this non-toxic, non-gel, dry comfort cushion provides constant cooling that requires no power or refrigeration.

Hmmmm.  "One-time activation."  What in Hades did that mean?  Well, it meant a four-step process that took six hours and required the dexterous opening and closing of a value cap, "a calibrated measuring container," 8-9 cups of warm tap water, a flat surface, waiting four hours, forcing air into an air pocket bubble, sweeping one's arm across a deflating air pocket, creating a vacuum seal while facing east on an overcast day, and finally a cool down until the Chillow appeared wrinkly and vacuum packed.

"SoothSoft technology" doesn't sound healthy to Flann.  Why do the instructions warn: NEVER PUT IN FREEZER or DO NOT SHARE THE CHILLOW or DO NOT EMPTY WATER in large bold type? 

What's really in the Chillow?

Comments

[Flannista]

I'm honestly curious about how the sistas in the sassosphere cope with hot flashes. Matissta is around me enough (and now, Jerseysista) to see for themselves how intense my hot flashes are. You can literally see drops of sweat from every pore. During meeting presentations, participants have asked me if I'm okay, if I need to sit down, etc.

I visited several websites yesterday to learn more about them. All of them said that one way to lessen their severity is to exercise at least 30 minutes a day. I average 50 minutes of exercise a day.

Interesting, most of the websites said meditation helps as well. We'll see.

[Flannista]

I would also love to know how you cope with hot flashes. This is the only "sure-fire" relief for me:

http://haacked.com/images/haacked_com/WindowsLiveWriter/DrinkingfromtheFireHose_4FA/bronx-summer-open-fire-hydrant%5B1%5D_3.jpg

[Flannista]

I'll be back to dish more on the Chillow.

That thing creeps me out. Honestly, what's in that thing?

[Flannista]

A sass-out to half-a-sista who gifted me with the sweet lavender receiving blanket upon which the Chillow rests. In many ways, the receiving blanket gives me a better night's sleep than the Chillow does.

(Don't tell anyone, but that sweet receiving blanket also travels with me.)

[half-a-sista]

Flann, you neglected to say to all your spontaenously combusting sistas whether or not the Chillow worked for you. does it keep you cool and minty fresh (oops...a mixed commercial metaphor?)? Does it work?

Sounds to me like the Chillow soaks up the sweat so quickly that you don't realize it, kinda like a giant absording papertowel, those ones they advertise on TV that soak up 2 cups of liquid with a single sheet of papertowel. I'd be careful with it. It might start drawing water out of you. You could be sucked dry of all the water in your body and they would find a dessicated husk of you in bed with your shrunken head on the chillow.

[half-a-sista]

the secret code to post my last comment was

ugh4nc

That translates to "Ugh! Foreign C" "C" stands for "Chillow". Was it made in China as in a foreign Chillow? I'd check.

When I get really old and really paranoid, I'll make a greater conspiracy theoristy...getting messages from the secret codes to post comments.

The posting code for this one may be something like, "UR2NTZ"

[Flannista]

The jury's still out on the Chillow, half-a.

It is amazingly cool to the touch during the day. I keep it beside me when I sleep, and when I wake up with my first hot flash, I put it atop my pillow. Once I lay my head on it, though, I swear the coolness evaporates in less then a minute, so I keep moving my head to another corner of the thing, etc. By the morning, the Chillow is actually warm to the touch. I believe my hot flashes are THAT intense. The Chillow can't keep up.

I actually WISH the thing would suck more water out of me. And given how big my head can be at times, I don't think there's any chance of it shrinking beyond recognition.

And regarding those secret codes -- I've lost count of how many of mine have eerily tied in with that day's post and/or my comment. It IS a conspiracy, half-a. I wouldn't be surprised if those behind the conspiracy are somehow linked with the manufacturers of the Chillow.

[Flannista]

Here's what I really think is inside the Chillow -- the dead bodies of these:

http://blog.media-freaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/free-games-for-kids35.jpg

[half-a-sista]

Did you know that the Chillow is not to be used by pets? The company makes a different version for dogs to lie on. They also have Chillow like things for various body parts...don't go there, Flann...which relieve heat. I've spent the last 15 minutes reading testimonials (which are all on company sponsored sites). none of them said where the things are made.

Still Suspicious.

[PEACEsista]

I have a friend who carried a fold-up Japanese paper fan with her all through menopause and if a hot flash hit her during a meeting, she'd whip it out and begin fanning herself. I loved how proactive she was, instead of pretending that nothing was happening. There is a southern sensibility to it that really appeals to me, too. Another friend dressed in layers with the bottom layer made from the stuff that wicks away moisture. She said she had to do this or her clothes would be soaked with perspiration.

I seldom have a hot flash during the day. I do have night sweats sometimes, but find that kicking the covers off usually cools me down nicely. I do meditate and had never considered it as a source of peaceful menopause ... but I will now!

[Flannista]

I have a little battery-operated fan, PEACE, that I often forget to carry with me (preferring instead to stuff my jeans pockets with an iPhone and dog biscuits. Hmmmm -- wonder if there is an iPhone app for hot flash relief). I also have a lovely Japanese paper fan somewhere.

I can't remember the last time I wore a pull-over sweater or sweatshirt. When I began to have hot flashes five years ago, I began to dress in layers. Trouble is, you can only take off so much during a client meeting. Nothing like sweat on silk.

How does noway feel about you kicking off the covers? I do that, too, of course, but then get cold, so it's on and off, on and off all night.

My oldest sister told me that my mother still gets hot flashes. She's 81. Please, sweet Jesus, I don't want to carry that gene.

[Flannista]

Thanks, half-a, for your continued investigation.

You know something creepy is going on when a pillow has to be "activated," like a cell phone or a military exercise or some of the stuff in closed containers in Jersey's refrigerator.

[babysis]

I'm only getting night sweats now and then, which so drench whatever I'm wearing that I usually get cool fast with the covers off.

I'm dreading the hot flashes though. I have friends who whip out their fans in any crowd, making them easy to locate from a distance. We don't wear many layers to begin with in Florida, but one day I'm thinking my Tuesday small group will end up in bras and panties (and we're not playing poker).

That Chillow thing is creepy. Seems like it'd be less trouble to hire some shirtless hunks to wave palm fronds over you all night (since that wouldn't make you hotter).

[PEACEsista]

Flann, from the steps you've described to "activate" your pillow, I figured that the manufacturer's figured you'd be done with menopause by the time you completed them all. Then, when you rested your weary head on the Chillow you'd say, "Hey it works!"

[Flannista]

babysis: "some shirtless hunks to wave palm fronds over you all night."

Damn, that image made me chortle and your parenthetical editorial comment made me laugh out loud. And now I'm picturing you at your Tuesday small group (don't be embarrassed that it's a Bible study!) in bras and panties. What can I say, but "Sweet Jesus!"

And just you wait, darlin' -- just you wait. I want all my beloveds to suffer from them as much as I do, that's how ornery they make me.

Interesting theory, PEACE. I'll sleep on it. But how do you explain the WARNINGS IN BOLD TYPE? "DO NOT SHARE THE CHILLOW"?

What could that possibly mean other than the thing is becoming a home for terrible and rapidly-multiplying bacteria that will cause an illness SO VILE I'll long for the days when I suffered only from hot flashes.

[babysis]

Flann, so glad I could provide some laughter. You'll be the first place I look for humor (not sympathy) when it's my turn.

As for the Chillow, I have a suspicion. Do a little research on John Carpenter's The Thing movie, and I think you'll see the problem. There's a monster in that pillow, and he doesn't like heat. Do not share the chillow.

[PEACEsista]

I've got a suspicion, too, from the capitalistic marketing side. Flann, selling pillows to menopausal women with night sweats is a niche market at best. The people selling them want to be SURE that everyone who needs one knows that they should have their OWN Chillow.

I guess this also means that we won't find Chillows offered in hotels anytime soon! BEWARE if you do!

[Flannista]

PEACE -- damn capitalism! The real monster in the pillow (sorry, babysis). I should have figured that one out myself.

Now I want to toss the thing, but I'm afraid of what might happen if it is left in a dark, enclosed place like a trash can for a day or two:

http://www.hemmy.net/images/animals/hugecrab18.jpg

[Flannista]

Do I have to resort to this thing?

http://www.foureyesjokeshop.com/ProductImages/gaggifts/hot%20flash%20extinguisher.jpg

[Matissta]

I did hear that this worked for some women. But Flann's hot flashes are of epic proportions, maybe she needs a second Chillow.

I'm also wondering if a couple of ice packs might do the same.

[Westsista]

I once had a hot flash that lasted for about 36 hours. Some flash. I was driving up to Big Sur, and I thought my air conditioning was not working. No, it was my BODY that wasn't working. It was a relief to get to the cooler temperatures of Big Sur but I was still burning up for hours after getting there. Who knows how long it would have lasted without those cool ocean breezes?

I never did figure out what to do with my hot flashes. I did finally learn what NOT to do. These were my triggers: (1) Getting too warm temperature wise. (2) Getting angry. (3) Getting frustrated. (4) Being overtired. (5) Did I mention getting angry?

I used to stick my head in the freezer for a few minutes, which seemed to help. I know it sounds ridiculous, and it is, but when you're desperate these are the things you try. I took cold baths (cold showers just irritate me and that was NOT helpful).

If it happened in a meeting, I would just grab whatever was handy (my papers or folders, anyone else's paper or folders, etc) and fan myself. Sometimes I would say "is it warm in here?" so that the men in the room would feel more comfortable by pretending that it was extremely hot. I found that men found the whole thing much more embarrassing than I did. If I worried about what other people thought, that would just irritate me, leading to additional hot flashes.

[Westsista]

I just remembered something else that happened to me when I was going through a deadly series of hot flashes at work. A good friend of mine has Asperger's, which made him not always particularly tactful. I had a major hot flash while standing in his cube once, and when I explained that it was a menopausal thing, he said "aren't you a little young for that?" I would have hugged him except that being touched was difficult for him. Many of my other male friends with no social disorders weren't able to think as fast as he did.

[Flannista]

OMG, West.

How can I EVER, EVER bitch again about my hot flashes? If my hot flashes, according to Matissta, are of "epic proportions," your 36-hour one was, well, legendary.

(I will, of course, continue to bitch about my hot flashes, but wanted to give your story some time to soak in the 'sphere.)

I cannot imagine a hot flash that lasts for 36 hours. I'm ready to jump out of a moving car when one lasts longer than 20 seconds. Deep bow to you, sista, and thank gawd you were in Big Sur. Should have been called Big Madam that day and a half.

I don't know why I've never thought of sticking my head in a freezer, but will try that now.

And yes, men in corporate America are obviously uncomfortable when a hot flash erupts. One male colleague referred to it as "that women's thing." Wanted to beat him over the head with that male thing of his.

[Flannista]

Matissta -- I need a SECOND Chillow?

So I'm a Flannista sandwich at night? One on the underside of my head and the other on top? How would I breathe?

And now I'm picturing myself as John Hurt's character in the first "Alien" movie when that baby alien attaches itself to his face.

HOT FLASH: GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU BITCH!

[Flannista]

Anyone in the 'sphere want to tell Flann and West what the "gift" of hot flashes might be?

Go ahead . . . we dare you.