Are you sitting down?
About a month ago, Matissta came across the above video for the Kohler "Numi Comfort Height one-piece elongated 1.28 gpf toilet with integrated bidet". It features:
- Compact, streamlined form
- Hands-free opening and closing of the toilet seat
- Advanced bidet functionality with integrated dryer
- Water efficient flush that uses only 1.28 or 0.6 gallons
- Lighting, heating and music to "enhance your environment"
- Intuitive touch-screen remote
And it can all be yours for a mere $6,390.00.
The Sassistas! believe for that price, this toilet ought to have a more "compact, streamlined" name. Please post your sassgestions for a name, and we shall submit them to Kohler. Who knows? Kohler may love the name so much that we get a free Numi Whatever. Thank you.
This should be called Midas's Throne. Only it should come with one additional accessory: a diamond-studded crown and/or tiara to wear while seated.
Posted by: treesta | June 07, 2012 at 05:28 AM
Mornin', treesta -- "Midas's Throne" is good. I knew someone would come up with a name using "throne". What turns into gold while seated?
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 05:32 AM
You check out the woman's sexy legs in this video? I know I think of sexy legs ever time I sit on a toidy.
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 05:33 AM
THE ASS KISSER
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 05:34 AM
Actually, considering it's sitting in a glass-enclosed penthouse, maybe it should be called the Pee'n'Peep. Wait long enough and you'll see a bit more than the woman's sexy legs.
Posted by: treesta | June 07, 2012 at 05:38 AM
Would I have to wait, "indefinitely", treesta?
I like "The Pee n' Peep" except it's lacking a certain "finesse" coveted by the folks who would buy one of these. Or perhaps I should call it, in this case, "finasse". Actually, that's a pretty good name:
FINASSE
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 05:44 AM
Where does the music come from? Yesterday when I researched this toidy, I noticed for an additional $600 or so, you could buy a pair of speakers.
I have to tell you, this thing has nothin' on the electric kazoo with mini amp that Sista C gifted me with.
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 05:49 AM
OK, if we need to add some finesse to the Pee'n'Peep, we could say it in french:
Le Pipi'n'Peep. Use a french accent now. Works, don'tcha think?
Posted by: treesta | June 07, 2012 at 05:57 AM
So for an additional $1,200, we could get Quadraphonic Surroundsound for Le Pipi'n'Peep?
Posted by: treesta | June 07, 2012 at 05:59 AM
"Le Pipi n' Peep" -- hmmmmm, a little better, but sounds like a Hanna Barbara cartoon character.
"Le Pipi" works better. For an additional $10,000 customers can get a "peep" of whatever floats their flush valve.
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 06:04 AM
The "integrated dryer" -- what exactly is that thing for?
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 06:10 AM
Actually, Flann, it is a Warner Bros character I was thinking of:
The spokesperson for Le Pipi'n'Peep would be Pepe le Pew:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/d/d9/Pepe_Le_Pew.jpg/200px-Pepe_Le_Pew.jpg
The integrated dry is to fluff Pepe's derriere.
Posted by: treesta | June 07, 2012 at 06:23 AM
Thanks for the correction, treesta. So how about this for a name?
PEEPEE LE PEW
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 06:30 AM
Brainstorming at its best this morning. Let me guess where you're sitting.
Posted by: Matissta | June 07, 2012 at 07:21 AM
It would be more appropriate to call it a brain dump, Matiss.
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 07:51 AM
Butt surely I jest.
(And don't call me Shirley.)
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 07:52 AM
HOITY-TOITY
Posted by: Matissta | June 07, 2012 at 07:54 AM
Damn, Matiss. That's good. You're on a roll (of TP, of course).
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 07:58 AM
PITH STOP
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 08:35 AM
Pooella
Posted by: frida | June 07, 2012 at 09:01 AM
OMG, frida, that actually has some poetic potential. Or poopetic potential?
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 09:05 AM
THE ROYAL JUBILEE
Posted by: Matissta | June 07, 2012 at 09:07 AM
A possible tagline for the winning name:
"The #1 Solution for #1 and #2 for The 1%"
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 09:16 AM
I thought those were your glams, Flann. Nothing like new adventures. Will have to consider for Peace's birthday. In 10 years we will all have one of these and the cost will be a fraction of what it is now.
Posted by: Nowayasista | June 07, 2012 at 09:27 AM
Actually, noway, in 10 years there will no doubt be an app for this on our smart phones.
Posted by: Flannista | June 07, 2012 at 09:34 AM