Purple Envy

 

On Tuesday afternoon, while getting storm supplies,

the Sassistas! discovered this:

Bottles of Maker's Mark dipped in PURPLE wax,

NOT the traditional RED wax.

Why?

Please sass in.

 

Comments

[Matissta]

Like you, Maker's Mark wanted to mix it up with their coloring.

[Matissta]

The purple bottle was the one with the lower alcohol percentage. There were only a few made when they realized what a mistake it was. So much so that they're having a hard time selling them.

[Flannista]

Actually, Matissta -- that's what we initially thought (your 7:01 comment), but after comparing the purple-wax-top label with the red-wax-top label, we realized that both we exactly the same: same alcohol content and wording.

Good guess, though.

AND WHAT A STUPID MARKETING DECISION THAT WAS, (INITIALLY).

[Flannista]

I think these bottles are from a barrel for Alice Walker, who I understand is also a Maker's Mark ambassador:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Color-Purple-ebook/dp/B005NY4QGM/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1362659594&sr=1-2&keywords=the+color+purple+%2B+alice+walker

[Flannista]

Only Purple Heart recipients can buy these bottles.

[Flannista]

Only this guy can buy these bottles:

http://josh.st/blog/wp-content/2006/08/countvoncount.jpg

[treesta]

Just to derail the Sass for a moment, I'd like to tell my morning's story:

I got to work and pulled up in the back of the school to put a bag of trash into the dumpster. I walked up to the dumpster with my car keys in the same hand as the bag of trash.

I thought to myself, "treesta, you'd better be careful or you'll throw your keys in the dumpster."

Did I move my keys to my other hand? No, of course not. I watched myself throw my bag of trash and my keys into the dumpster. In slow motion, I watched the keys sail through the air and into the dumpster. Thankfully, it was empty save for the bag of trash and my keys, which landed with a glurp in a mushy mound of toxic sludge in the bottom of the dumpster.

I thought to myself, "Jiminy Pat, I just threw my keys in the dumpster." I looked at them, tantalizingly out of my reach, as they sunk just a bit deeper into the sludge. "Damn."

I did not want to go into school and admit that I'd just thrown my keys into a mushy mound of toxic sludge in the bottom of the dumpster, so I stood there looking into the dumpster for several minutes, scratching my head, saying out loud, "I can't believe you did that, treesta."

I scrounged through my car, finally finding a long-handled ice scraper in the back of the trunk. After several muddled attempts, I dragged the keys across the bottom of the dumpster and trapped the keys, along with a handful of the toxic sludge against the side of the dumpster. Ever so slowly, I pulled the keys and the sludge up the side of the dumpster until I could reach them.

It only took 3 washings with hand sanitizer to get the smell of dumpster toxic sludge off the keys.

A shot of Maker's Mark with any color wax will work well tonight.

[Peter]

I think the bottles were made for the secret release of this guy's new album:
http://static.nme.com/images/blog/2012PrincePurpleRainMoviePress051212.jpg

[Peter]

Though, according to the internet...the bottles are dipped in purple wax to celebrate the ravens' super bowl win. sounds like a collector's item to me.

[Flannista]

Peter: we knew about the Ravens thing, but hate that team so refuse to acknowledge it. I'd rather it be a tribute to Prince (as weird as he is) than the Ravens.

treesta: dumpster diver? Oh dear.

[Nowayasista]

I know there is this thing about Maker's Mark. The purple is just to match your hair, Flan. Or maybe it's to designate a bottle of the toxic sludge Treesta ( jiminy pat). However, a new kid is on the block and the days of MM lust may be numbered. www.wyomingwhiskey.com.

[PEACEsista]

http://www.wyomingwhiskey.com/

[Sista C]

Flannista, I challenge you to tell us why the bottles have purple wax, with your explanation containing the following words: Can opener, donkey, aluminum siding and light bulb.

[Sista C]

Treesta, couldn't help but laugh. Loved your story.

[Flannista]

I watched the video that PEACEsista posted in her 9:07 a.m. comment. I'm assuming that's noway on the horse.

WW win over MM? No way.

[Flannista]

Sista C: I'll take up your 9:08 challenge if you do.

[Matissta]

treesta, your story reads like these ridiculous game shows they have on these days. If only you were on a spinning object while trying to access the keys, NOW that would have been impressive!

Or it could have been a Macgyver episode. If only you had a mulett...

[Peter]

Why do you hate the ravens?

[Flannista]

Peter -- two words: Ray Lewis, though I know that most NFL teams have their own Ray Lewis.

[Flannista]

Sista C: while going on a loooong walk, I had the brilliant idea of presenting your story challenge to the First Graders tomorrow morning, except not bring Makers Mark into it; simply ask them to write a story about where the color purple came from but they had to include the four elements you suggested. I've never explored with the kids how color can impact a story, so I think it just might work.

What do you think? If I get good stories, I'll do a special post about it.

[Flannista]

Also while on my walk, it occurred to me that Makers Mark was paying respect to the Christian church season. Purple is the traditional color for Lent and MM didn't want anyone to be tempted to give up their Lenten observes by giving up booze.

[Flannista]

Came home from my walk to an email from nowayasista that said:

"I own this hat. MM makes nothing nearly as cool."

Here's the image of noway's hat:

http://www.sassistas.com/sassistas_our_dish_on_the/2013/07/WWhat.jpeg

Here is MM's hat. I'll let the sassosphere decide:

http://www.sassistas.com/sassistas_our_dish_on_the/2013/07/Mmcap.jpg

[Matissta]

Well, the Wyoming Whiskey hat would only look good because noway would be wearing it. The Marker's Mark hat doesn't need any help. I vote for the MM hat.

Maybe the WW hat would look better in purple lettering.

[Flannista]

Took the words right out of my mouth, Matissta. The WW hat would only look good on noway.

The MM hat wins, hands down.

[treesta]

Maybe we need to do a blind taste test - Wyoming Whiskey, Makers Mark, and Gentleman Jack. Everybody get a little airline bottle version of each. Everyone's on their honor to truly make it a blind test. Hmmmm...

(I like the Wyoming Whiskey hat better, by the way.)