Sassistas! Our dish on the social soup.

One Size Does Not Fit All

As an official Maker's Mark Ambassador, Flannista receives a special holiday gift from the bourbon manufacturer every holiday season. Yesterday, Flann received (rather late, don't you think?) her holiday gift for 2011: my very own Maker's Mark bottle sweater. Look at the above image and the one below. What's the difference? And what should Flann do about it?

Do You See What I See?

Last week, Kathleen Morris, one of the artists represented in Flannista's private art collection opened a show at my favorite gallery, the Box Gallery in Santa Fe, New Mexico.  One painting in the show called, "Dialog" (above, right) caught my eye because it reminded me of a painting already in my private collection by Anne St. John Hawley (above, left) called, "The Body in Mysterious Ceremony".  The Hawley painting is large (40" x 29.5") and the Morris is small (16" x 13"). 

Is Flannista crazy to see a similarity between these two paintings?  Do you see any?  If so, what similarities do you see?

 

 

Feedback

Late yesterday morning, Flannista finally got feedback about that huge writing project that consumed the life of the Sassistas! the past month.

It was good news/bad news.

I've been a professional long enough to know that the news won't be optimal when, at the onset, your client spends an inordinate amount of time discussing the weather. Then the awkward pause.  Then, "The team would like to express our gratitude for what you brought to this and want to be certain that you get paid quickly."

"This" is a made-for-TV movie screenplay about video gaming that arrived in horrible shape.  The producers panicked because the project had already been green-lighted (in fact, they began shooting yesterday). Through odd TRM connections, I got an out-of-the-blue call at the beginning of August to see if I could rewrite the screenplay which was "only 30 percent there".  I was given notes from the producers about what wasn't working in the screenplay as well as parameters about what I could or could not change. I was also given 10 days to complete the revisions.

The good news: "several of your ideas put the fear of God into the director (who is also the original screenplay writer) who is now making his own revisions."  Also, several aspects/ideas I brought to the script were "very creative" bringing "whole other textures" to the screenplay "showing the benefits of living in community."

The bad news: "You had too much respect for the original writer and did not blow up the script.  If we were moving forward with you on this you would have had to tear down the walls of this thing."  

"Blow up the script." "Tear down the walls of this thing."  I never heard either of those phrases from the producer the two times we talked prior to yesterday's feedback.  He then pointed out specific things that weren't working in my revisions which was helpful and, I suspect, beyond the kindness of most Hollywood producers.

Then another awkward silence.

FLANN: Well . . . bottom line, can I do this . . . write screenplays?

PRODUCER: I can definitely affirm your writing skills.  God has definitely given you a gift.

FLANN: Would you use me again?

PRODUCER: We don't know if we'll get future projects.  But do send the invoice.

Some more pleasantries about the pros and cons of joining the Writer's Guild of America and that was that.

Matiss and I are disappointed and not disappointed. We keep going back to the fact that I was never explicitly told "to blow up the script".  Lord knows, I would have done that. That's one of my writing strengths: I am fearless.

A month ago, I was in a dark hole, living with the grief of losing Gwen and Tim as well as a professional incident that communicated to me that I was "washed up."  Then this project fell from the sky.  And now it's gone. 

I'm not in a dark hole anymore, but something seems to be missing. I honestly can't figure out the lesson, the message, the meaning, the moral, the whatever of this.

Got some feedback?

 

Economic Slump

Sigh. Just when the Sassistas! thought we could relax a little . . . 

Above is a chart of yesterday's stock sell-off depicting the 280-point-slide of the Dow Jones industrial average.  The S & P 500 and Nasdaq Composite each tanked about more than 2%, too.  The U.S. economic recovery is faltering, many analysts believe, as evidenced by the dramatic slowdown of manufacturing and the exceptionally weak job creation in private industry in May.

According to the Washington Post:

Putting it all together, the economy is still expanding, but the pace is sluggish, and it’s clearly losing momentum. Several analysts who had been relatively optimistic about growth this year have cut back their estimates in recent weeks . . . .

“Earlier in its recovery, manufacturing had the wind at its back from a very pronounced rebuilding of inventories, said Cliff Waldman, economist at the Manufacturers Alliance/MAPI, a trade group. “At this point, however, elevated commodity prices, slowing global growth and an increasingly questionable outlook for the U.S. economy are creating head winds for the factory sector, which thus far has been the one strong element in an otherwise sluggish U.S. economic rebound.”

As stocks slumped, investors turned their attention to safer assets like bonds and, well, hiding money under a mattress. They certainly were not turning to real estate, following a report Tuesday that home prices have now tumbled further from their peak than during the Great Depression.  Some 6 million homes have already been lost to foreclosure with 4 million more mortgage holders 90 days or more late on their payments and considered likely to enter the foreclosure pipeline.

Then there's that debt ceiling thing.  We don't have a clue what that is, but we're fairly certain it's bad and that it's Obama's fault.

So does anyone have any good news?  About anything?  Anything at all . . .

Nail This

About a week ago in the Sunday newspaper coupon circular, the Sassistas! came across Salon Effects Real Nail Polish Strips by Sally Hansen: "Beauty you see, Beauty you feel, Beauty you know, Beauty that works." At first, we were amazed at the variety of colors and designs -- "24 fashion-forward styles"! Then we took in that they required no "dry time" and could be removed easily with nail polish remover. Last, we had to trust that "Sally knows that nails are the best accessory."  That being the case, we had to pause and ask ourselves: "Couldn't these polish strips be applied in other ways OTHER THAN just to our nails?"

We think so and we think you do, too!  What other uses can we find for Salon Effects Real Nail Polish Strips? The sista or mista with the best idea will win a coupon to save $2.00 on your purchase of these strips. What's more, the Sassistas! will send you the coupon and not charge ANY postage! So put on your Hansen Hats and let's start re-purposing!

 

Napping

Do you take take naps?  Even while at work?

If you regularly fight an overwhelming desire for a little nap, new research indicates that a midday nap would be the right thing to do.  It can dramatically restore and even boost your brain power afterward.

Researchers at the University of California at Berkeley took a group of 39 healthy adults and divided them into two groups.  All were given a rigorous learning task at noon designed to test their fact-based memories.  Both groups performed at comparable levels on that test.  Half of the group then took a 90-minute nap -- long enough to go through a full sleep cycle.  At 6 p.m. both groups were again given a round of tasks.  In this case, the nappers performed significantly better and actually improved in their capacity to learn, according to the study.

Exactly why the nap effect works, "is still a mystery," according to Berkeley assistant professor of psychology, Matthew Walker, lead investigator of the study.  "One theory is that particular types of brain-wave patterns that occur during sleep help change the storage locations of recently stored information from short-term to long-term, such that when you wake up, the short-term capacity for new memory formation is refreshed.  It's as though the email box in your hippocampus [where short-term memory is stored] is full and, until you sleep and clear out those fact e-mails, you're not going to receive any more mail.  It's just going to bounce until you sleep and move it into another folder."

Bottom line: staying up all night to study for an exam or to finish a big project at work, has a negative impact, decreasing the ability to recall crammed-in facts by nearly 40 percent, due to a shutdown of brain regions caused by sleep deprivation.

The Sassistas! believe that all Americans ought to take siestas at home and at work so we can be as smart as Flannista's cats.  What about you?  What are you napping habits?

Tattoo or No Tattoo?

The Sassistas! would like to acknowledge and thank Justista for dishing today's sass!

In June, I am retiring from a 35-year career in the law, and to prepare, I've been examining things, making lists, worrying and fretting. One of the things at the top of my retirement prep list is to get a tattoo of a lotus blossom on my right hand. I have no tattoos anywhere else but there is symbolic meaning to this one.

A child who called me "Granny Justista" was murdered in December, and I always thought of that child as a lotus blossom growing out of the muck. But even before that tragedy, I wanted to get an obvious tattoo to symbolize my retirement from the courtroom.  The lotus symbolizes the beauty that I found in my clients even though they grew in the murkiest of settings. So after much vacillation, I went to Sin City Tattoo, where Jeff -- who has lots of ink on him and several places where studs or rings have been pulled out and left shredded skin -- consulted with me. He tried to discourage me from getting my first tattoo on my hand where it was so obvious. But I was pleased when he said, "Just trying to make a statement, huh?" Together we discussed the design details. Color? Delicate or heavy?  Size?

Here's the thing: my partner Gruff and I have been together over 20 years. It is a strong relationship, and we both leave a lot of room for each other. Gruff hates tattoos. He thinks they are stupid and tacky. He has made it clear that he will be very unhappy if I go through with this plan. He threatens to grow his beard as long as ZZ Top. I actually thought this was kind of silly because I like ZZ Top, but it did show the strength of his feelings. 

So I have a dilemma. I've been thinking and dreaming about this tattoo for a year. I like "making a statement," but I'm not really sure that it is worth the above reaction from Gruff. I am weighing the importance of the tattoo against Gruff's feelings. 

So sassosphere: what compromises do we make for a relationship? Where do we draw the line (or perhaps the tattoo)?

Watson

 An Open Letter to Watson, the IBM Computer who this week on Jeopardy!, according to USA Today, "chewed up and spat out humanity's finest knights of trivia . . . in a $77,147 drubbing of past record winners Ken Jennings ($24,000 total) and Brad Rutter ($21,600):

Dr. Watson (we presume):

The Sassistas! watched you on "Jeopardy!" this week not only because "Jeopardy!" ends with an exclamation point like we do, but also because we were curious about how smart you really are. Bet you're feelin' like Hal from "2001: Space Odyssey" or "The Terminator" right now.  Look at you, all high and mighty and well, dull to look at, not to mention, listen to.

Here's one of the things that bugged us about you.  Those "Jeopardy!" episodes were really three long commercials for IBM disguised as "Jeopardy!"  How many times did we have to hear about how you were created and how forward-thinking IBM was?  Once was enough.  In fact, once was too many.  But you know what?  You aren't as smart as you think you are because we believe there are COUNTLESS questions you could never answer. For example:

• What is the meaning of life?
• Why is the sky blue?
• How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

We believe the sassosphere can come up with a bajillion questions such as these that you could NEVER answer. So there, Mr. Smarty-Pants.  Wait, you ain't got no pants.  There's another question for ya -- where in the hell are your pants?

Sincerely yours, The Sassistas!

P.S. Black is not a good color on you.

Sustainable Marriage

What makes a marriage -- or any long term relationship -- sustainable?  

Money?  Children?  Religion? 

Try "self-expansion".

In her New York Times article, "The Happy Marriage Is The 'Me" Marriage"  (published this past Sunday), writer Tara Parker-Pope makes quite a case for me, me, me in a marriage.  According to Parker-Pope:

For centuries, marriage was viewed as an economic and social institution, and the emotional and intellectual needs of the spouses were secondary to the survival of the marriage itself. But in modern relationships, people are looking for a partnership, and they want partners who make their lives more interesting.

Research shows that the more self-expansion people experience from their partner, the more committed and satisfied they are in the relationship.  To measure this, click here to take "The Sustainable Marriage Quiz."  Separately, the Sassistas! took the quiz and learned that each one of us ranks the other about "65" out of a possible "70".  What about you?  How do you rate your partner?

Most interesting to the Sassistas! was how this research showed that the best marriages are NOT the result of putting the relationship first, but rather putting yourself first.  We don't think marriages break up because of what you do to each other.  They break up because of what you must become in order to stay in them . . . often something other than yourself.  Today, as Parker-Pope writes, "people are looking for a partnership, and they want partners who make their lives more interesting."  Bottom line, if your partner is helping you to become a better person, the happier and more satisfied you will be which means the happier and more satisfied your marriage/relationship will be.

What do you think?

Hard Drive

Driving home the Mac technician last night was hard.  

With Brian in the back of Flannista's car was Flann's MacPro tower -- Mac's largest computer (it looks like a small silver refrigerator) that has been by Flannista's right side since June of 2007. Flann walked into her home office this morning and was greeted by what you see above.

The good news is that Brian was able to confirm that my external back-up hard drive had saved all of my most important documents and media.  Further that the "Media Pool" hard drive in the computer (which stores more film footage and photos) seemed to be okay.  The bad news is that the Macintosh hard drive appears to have failed, but this can only be confirmed by installing a new hard drive (which I ordered last night when I got home) in a couple of days. The absolute worst news would be that my computer problem is not the hard drive at all, but rather the mother board which will essentially mean trashing a $3,000 system. 

If you had been there when I purchased this system three and a half years ago, you would have a better appreciation for why the blood drains from my face when I think about losing it altogether.  Computers and me have never been a good fit.  It entailed a huge leap of faith to make the investment and to attempt to learn all the software.  

I'm kind of in a state of shock; certainly a state of limbo. My routine has been to wake up, go to the bathroom, rinse off my mouthguard and turn on the computer. Now I seem unmoored.  I am forced to spend time in other parts of my home, like the reading chair in my living room (where I sit now) or my small writing room.

When I asked Matissta why this happened she said, "To teach you patience." 

Patience is something Brian has in abundance, by the way.  Determining the cause of a malfunctioning computer is a painstaking process of elimination.  At one point, Brian totally reconfigured the computer to its original condition, meaning installing the original mouse and removing the 8 additional gigs of memory Matiss and I had installed this summer.  When I asked him why such and such wasn't working, he replied, "There really isn't any reason or cause.  Like people, computers have personalities.  Some are fussy and difficult."

"You mean my computer could have taken on MY personality?" I asked.

I'm trying to be patient until the new hard drive arrives, and Brian determines if that was indeed the problem all along.  I should know by the end of the week. Until then, I need some encouragement.  This computer was purchased as a means to harness and transform much of my creativity. I feel quiet and defeated. Like a dark monitor screen. Empty canvas. Blank piece of paper.

This might not be a bad thing.  

What do you think?