
The Sassistas! are either really dumb or really smart. We're goin' with smart, mainly because the sistas and mista who posted possible captions for Flann's bowling stance were ALL winners. Following are the award winners:
- BEST "BOWLING FOR JESUS" TIE-IN: PEACEsista for -- While Bowling for Jesus, no one told her that she didn't have to genuflect before throwing the ball.
- BEST PLAY ON WORDS: On-A-Journey-Sista for -- Flann froze in fear as she approached the foul line. The audience was silenced. You could hear a pin drop.
- BEST USE OF NARRATIVE: half-a-sista for -- The sacrificial virgin approached as close to the bowling god as she could. She squatted to offer the holy bowling ball to him before she ran down the lane and into his yawning mouth.
- BEST FASHION STATEMENT: frida for -- This season, the new flat shoes allow a woman to be herself.
- WIDE WORLD OF SPORTS AWARD: Chrysosista for -- Clearly, the Caber-tossing team was having a hard time understanding the finer points of bowling....
- MOST X-CEPTIONAL CAPTION: Jerseysista for -- Bowling for Jesus: Where x-tians really score.
- MOST OUTRAGEOUS CAPTIONS -- babysis
- MOST SEXUALLY OUTRAGEOUS CAPTION -- Carolyn
Because the Sassistas! cannot choose among the wonderful captions submitted by our beloved sistas and mista, we are awarding $25 gift certificates to each of you, with the exception of Jerseysista . . . if we can find a whisk you don't already have, it's on its way!
Today, we plan to email you each a $25 Amazon gift certificate. Please do us ONE more teensy-weensy favor. So we can keep our numbers up, please post your acceptance speech here. If you don't get it right the first time, do it again. Or pretend you're some famous person (or several famous people) accepting this prestigious Sassistas! PICTURE CAPTION award. Or let us know what you plan to purchase with your gift certificate . . . and why.
Thanks and love to all. May the Bowling God give you much time to spare (at Sassistas!).
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